sabato, agosto 30, 2003
Interview, Pt. 2
Be sure to visit Shy Lux and read her responses to my interview questions!
Back to RI
Flying back tomorrow. More joys of air travel in store. Less complaining about my mother as well.
Be sure to visit Shy Lux and read her responses to my interview questions!
Back to RI
Flying back tomorrow. More joys of air travel in store. Less complaining about my mother as well.
venerdì, agosto 29, 2003
Poison Dart Frogs and Bach?
The ads for today:
ReptileDepot.com
Quality Reptiles and Supplies at Discount Prices
21 Neue Bach Choräle
für Orgel, BWV Anh. 2, Die erste CD Luftpost nach Europa Frei
Related Searches: frogs bach
The ads for today:
ReptileDepot.com
Quality Reptiles and Supplies at Discount Prices
21 Neue Bach Choräle
für Orgel, BWV Anh. 2, Die erste CD Luftpost nach Europa Frei
Related Searches: frogs bach
The Joys of Air Travel Pt. 2
This is a little late. Just a tiny delay.
1. Flying a long distance on an airline like Delta used to get you at least a crummy little sandwich. Now, you are lucky to get a miniscule pak of pretzles. My connection was so tight (due to lateness) that I didn' t get to eat. So by the second leg of the trip I was starving. I could see them giving food to the first class people (damn them! Paying an additional $1000 doesn't entitle them to lunch!). And, worst of all, there was a long article about seafood in the inflight magazine. How can you starve people and then give them a food article???
2. On the second part of the flight, I was in the window seat. Of course, since flights are packed full these days, there was a woman in the middle and another one in the aisle. The woman in the aisle seat pulled out a big canister of wet wipes and began wiping down the armrest that she shared with middleseat woman. Middleseat woman seemed slightly taken aback. "Doctor's orders" said wetwipe woman. Then she wiped down the other arm and the tray table (front and back) and maybe some other stuff. (Later when I told this story to my dad, he said that she was probably on cancer chemotherapy drugs that supressed her immune system. Then I felt bad for staring at her with mouth agape as she wet-wiped.)
3. On the first part, I was sitting next to a mom and her two daughters. One of them was a cute 8-year old who liked to talk. She was putting on her shoes, which had a zipper instead of laces, and I said that I could use a pair of those for when I had to take them off for the security line. "They didn't make me take them off because they're sneakers!" she said. "But they did make me take off mine, which are sandals!" said her mom, showing her Birkenstocks. They did also make me take off my shoes, which were sneakers and lacked the metal zipper. Sure, it seems ridiculous to make an 8-year old take off her shoes, but I have also seen them pat down a white-haired old lady, so who knows what counts as ridiculous these days?
The little girl continued her story, which is paraphrased but still in quotes: "They wanted to look in my bag full of gifts for my dad. We got him a plate and it was wrapped but they wanted to open the wrapping and look at it. We also got him a bowl, but they didn't care about the bowl, just the plate!!"
"Maybe they were looking for a fork and knife or something" I said, joking.
"Yeah, and what about if the plate had a fork and knife painted on it? Then they would look and look and say 'we saw a fork and knife in here somewhere!' and then they would see that it was just painted on there and they would look at it and look at it and they would say "but it looks like a fork and knife!" and then they would decide, 'well, ok, I guess if it's just painted on there that it's OK'!"
It seems as though she has already understood the 'logic' of the system.
More thoughts on airport security
Once, a long time ago, I was sitting waiting for someone in the ABQ airport near the security screening area. They had the metal detector set so high that a majority of people would set it off as they walked through. Probaby about 7 of 10 people. But did this make them more cautious? No, not at all. They just waved the wand thing half-assedly over everyone and sent them on their way.
This makes me think of the fable of the boy who cried wolf. If everything from a forgotten pair of nail clippers to an underwire bra sets of the alarms, the alarms cease to mean anything. The physical alarms don't set off the proverbial alarms, in other words.
Plus, it just gets ridiculous. The security people go on power trips just like anyone else. Making someone strip in public? Common sense alone should tell us that this isn't making us more secure. When I went through, there was a blind woman being led by a young man (probably her grandson). The security person yelled at her to go in some line. The granson said that she couldn't go there alone because she is blind. The security person didn't care, saying that they needed to make room for something and only one person could go at a time and something... I had moved up in the line before I could hear how it was resolved. I just know that the blind woman looked terrified.
How could terrorizing a blind old woman be making us more secure?
This is a little late. Just a tiny delay.
1. Flying a long distance on an airline like Delta used to get you at least a crummy little sandwich. Now, you are lucky to get a miniscule pak of pretzles. My connection was so tight (due to lateness) that I didn' t get to eat. So by the second leg of the trip I was starving. I could see them giving food to the first class people (damn them! Paying an additional $1000 doesn't entitle them to lunch!). And, worst of all, there was a long article about seafood in the inflight magazine. How can you starve people and then give them a food article???
2. On the second part of the flight, I was in the window seat. Of course, since flights are packed full these days, there was a woman in the middle and another one in the aisle. The woman in the aisle seat pulled out a big canister of wet wipes and began wiping down the armrest that she shared with middleseat woman. Middleseat woman seemed slightly taken aback. "Doctor's orders" said wetwipe woman. Then she wiped down the other arm and the tray table (front and back) and maybe some other stuff. (Later when I told this story to my dad, he said that she was probably on cancer chemotherapy drugs that supressed her immune system. Then I felt bad for staring at her with mouth agape as she wet-wiped.)
3. On the first part, I was sitting next to a mom and her two daughters. One of them was a cute 8-year old who liked to talk. She was putting on her shoes, which had a zipper instead of laces, and I said that I could use a pair of those for when I had to take them off for the security line. "They didn't make me take them off because they're sneakers!" she said. "But they did make me take off mine, which are sandals!" said her mom, showing her Birkenstocks. They did also make me take off my shoes, which were sneakers and lacked the metal zipper. Sure, it seems ridiculous to make an 8-year old take off her shoes, but I have also seen them pat down a white-haired old lady, so who knows what counts as ridiculous these days?
The little girl continued her story, which is paraphrased but still in quotes: "They wanted to look in my bag full of gifts for my dad. We got him a plate and it was wrapped but they wanted to open the wrapping and look at it. We also got him a bowl, but they didn't care about the bowl, just the plate!!"
"Maybe they were looking for a fork and knife or something" I said, joking.
"Yeah, and what about if the plate had a fork and knife painted on it? Then they would look and look and say 'we saw a fork and knife in here somewhere!' and then they would see that it was just painted on there and they would look at it and look at it and they would say "but it looks like a fork and knife!" and then they would decide, 'well, ok, I guess if it's just painted on there that it's OK'!"
It seems as though she has already understood the 'logic' of the system.
More thoughts on airport security
Once, a long time ago, I was sitting waiting for someone in the ABQ airport near the security screening area. They had the metal detector set so high that a majority of people would set it off as they walked through. Probaby about 7 of 10 people. But did this make them more cautious? No, not at all. They just waved the wand thing half-assedly over everyone and sent them on their way.
This makes me think of the fable of the boy who cried wolf. If everything from a forgotten pair of nail clippers to an underwire bra sets of the alarms, the alarms cease to mean anything. The physical alarms don't set off the proverbial alarms, in other words.
Plus, it just gets ridiculous. The security people go on power trips just like anyone else. Making someone strip in public? Common sense alone should tell us that this isn't making us more secure. When I went through, there was a blind woman being led by a young man (probably her grandson). The security person yelled at her to go in some line. The granson said that she couldn't go there alone because she is blind. The security person didn't care, saying that they needed to make room for something and only one person could go at a time and something... I had moved up in the line before I could hear how it was resolved. I just know that the blind woman looked terrified.
How could terrorizing a blind old woman be making us more secure?
Bureaucracy and Horrible Suffering
I have been in a bad mood not just because my parents drive me nuts but also because I am having yet another round of problems with unexpected additional bureaucracy involving my graduate student grant (which I need to pay my rent and eat and stuff).
I have been in a bad mood not just because my parents drive me nuts but also because I am having yet another round of problems with unexpected additional bureaucracy involving my graduate student grant (which I need to pay my rent and eat and stuff).
giovedì, agosto 28, 2003
Wedding frenzy
My best friend from high school is in town for her sister's wedding this weekend. I was going to meet her for lunch yesterday, but she wasn't feeling well (this may have had something to do with her father waking the whole family up at 3am to see Mars). So I just went to her house to catch up.
For the afternoon, the phone rang off the hook. People just kept stopping by and leaving. Her sister was frantically trying to make little party favors, and we were helping to glue/cut/design.
My friend and her family had planned a "surprise" shower for her sister. The theme was a 24-hour shower - each person got an invitation with a "time," for which they would bring a gift. For example, for 8am you could bring coffee or pancake mix, for 4 tea, or for 11pm a pillow, etc. But apparently some people got confused and thought the gift time was when the shower would be (even though the 6pm shower time was listed clearly on the invitation). So people would RSVP - I'll see you at 2pm! or 11am! What kind of a surprise will this be, I wonder?
One invitation went to some of their family members who are orignally from India. Apparently, some uncle or cousin, who is 70 years old and doesn't speak English very well, called to say he would be there at 2pm. Her mother tried to explain that 1) the shower is for women and 2) it's at 6pm, 2pm just represented the gift time. He had absolutely no idea what she was talking about. At the end of the conversation he said, "so I'll see you at 2:00."
I know it will be a beautiful wedding, but this whole thing makes me happy that my husband and I eloped. I would never want a large wedding, what a lot of stress! Plus, with my mother, stepfather, father, stepmother, my husband's mother, his stepfather, his father, and his stepmother, that's just too many parents to manage!
On that topic:
My parents have been divorced for over 15 years, but they still can't be in the same room without some sort of subsequent drama. I was with my mom in the grocery store the other day. All of a sudden she seemed to be talking to someone, but I coudn't see who it was. Then I noticed that it was my father, but he was hiding behind a pole and some sort of food display.
"You look different!" said my mom.
"So do you" said my dad. Then he ran away.
So, even though the meeting lasted 20 seconds, I have been hearing about it ever since from *both* of my parents.
My mom: "He said I look different! What is that supposed to mean!" No matter that she said he looked different first. Also: "Why did he run away like that! I'm the one who should run away!"
My dad: "Is there something that I should say to your mother? I don't know what I should say. Is there something I should be saying to her? I don't know what I should say to her..." My answer was no, I can't think of anything that wouldn't make things worse. My dad is pretty socially inept, so I doubt he could come up with anything even good enough to be neutral.
Another reason to be glad we didn't have a wedding. Now I just have to fear my upcoming graduation!
My best friend from high school is in town for her sister's wedding this weekend. I was going to meet her for lunch yesterday, but she wasn't feeling well (this may have had something to do with her father waking the whole family up at 3am to see Mars). So I just went to her house to catch up.
For the afternoon, the phone rang off the hook. People just kept stopping by and leaving. Her sister was frantically trying to make little party favors, and we were helping to glue/cut/design.
My friend and her family had planned a "surprise" shower for her sister. The theme was a 24-hour shower - each person got an invitation with a "time," for which they would bring a gift. For example, for 8am you could bring coffee or pancake mix, for 4 tea, or for 11pm a pillow, etc. But apparently some people got confused and thought the gift time was when the shower would be (even though the 6pm shower time was listed clearly on the invitation). So people would RSVP - I'll see you at 2pm! or 11am! What kind of a surprise will this be, I wonder?
One invitation went to some of their family members who are orignally from India. Apparently, some uncle or cousin, who is 70 years old and doesn't speak English very well, called to say he would be there at 2pm. Her mother tried to explain that 1) the shower is for women and 2) it's at 6pm, 2pm just represented the gift time. He had absolutely no idea what she was talking about. At the end of the conversation he said, "so I'll see you at 2:00."
I know it will be a beautiful wedding, but this whole thing makes me happy that my husband and I eloped. I would never want a large wedding, what a lot of stress! Plus, with my mother, stepfather, father, stepmother, my husband's mother, his stepfather, his father, and his stepmother, that's just too many parents to manage!
On that topic:
My parents have been divorced for over 15 years, but they still can't be in the same room without some sort of subsequent drama. I was with my mom in the grocery store the other day. All of a sudden she seemed to be talking to someone, but I coudn't see who it was. Then I noticed that it was my father, but he was hiding behind a pole and some sort of food display.
"You look different!" said my mom.
"So do you" said my dad. Then he ran away.
So, even though the meeting lasted 20 seconds, I have been hearing about it ever since from *both* of my parents.
My mom: "He said I look different! What is that supposed to mean!" No matter that she said he looked different first. Also: "Why did he run away like that! I'm the one who should run away!"
My dad: "Is there something that I should say to your mother? I don't know what I should say. Is there something I should be saying to her? I don't know what I should say to her..." My answer was no, I can't think of anything that wouldn't make things worse. My dad is pretty socially inept, so I doubt he could come up with anything even good enough to be neutral.
Another reason to be glad we didn't have a wedding. Now I just have to fear my upcoming graduation!
Things my Mother Does to Aggravate Me/Push my Buttons, Part 3
I was sitting with my mom, and she asked me if it seemed like she and my stepfather have a good marriage. This sounded really familiar (see Pt. 1), so I was wary. Then was the next question, of course, about my father and stepmother's marriage.
"Why are you asking me this! You already asked me this same question a few days ago!" I said, not happy.
"No I didn't. I never asked you that question before!" she insisted.
So, not only was she asking me the same unpleasant question in the same manipulative way, she had already forgotten the first time, and as a result she was accusing me of making it up.
What am I going to say here? Read my blog. It's all right there. No.
So we got into a big fight, her accusing me of making things up and putting words in her mouth, and me upset that she can't even come up with a new manipulative tactic or remember which ones she already used.
I'm glad I have this blog so I can write it down, otherwise my head would explode!
I was sitting with my mom, and she asked me if it seemed like she and my stepfather have a good marriage. This sounded really familiar (see Pt. 1), so I was wary. Then was the next question, of course, about my father and stepmother's marriage.
"Why are you asking me this! You already asked me this same question a few days ago!" I said, not happy.
"No I didn't. I never asked you that question before!" she insisted.
So, not only was she asking me the same unpleasant question in the same manipulative way, she had already forgotten the first time, and as a result she was accusing me of making it up.
What am I going to say here? Read my blog. It's all right there. No.
So we got into a big fight, her accusing me of making things up and putting words in her mouth, and me upset that she can't even come up with a new manipulative tactic or remember which ones she already used.
I'm glad I have this blog so I can write it down, otherwise my head would explode!
mercoledì, agosto 27, 2003
Marte
I forgot to add that the newsreporter and cameraman from the local Univision Spanish-language channel were at the observatory. The kept moving to different spots, turning on their bright camera light, and shining it in people's faces.
I forgot to add that the newsreporter and cameraman from the local Univision Spanish-language channel were at the observatory. The kept moving to different spots, turning on their bright camera light, and shining it in people's faces.
Mars, oh fickle one
My dad and I went to the observatory to see Mars on this its closest day. It was cloudy, which is a bit atypical for New Mexico. There were hoardes and hoardes of people! They had announced the Mars thing on the front page of the paper and everyone wanted to see it!
I think it is like people who only go to church on Easter and Christmas. They only go to the observatory for big planetary events. (My dad used to take me to the observatory a lot when I was growing up, and it's never crowded on a regular day). So Mars was there but behind a cloud and a tree. We gave up and left, but the line for the big telescope was so long it blocked the parking lot exit. We drove over the curb and made our escape!
Later we looked at Mars in the driveway with a pair of binoculars. It looked like a wiggly bright speck. So I saw it!
THE END
My dad and I went to the observatory to see Mars on this its closest day. It was cloudy, which is a bit atypical for New Mexico. There were hoardes and hoardes of people! They had announced the Mars thing on the front page of the paper and everyone wanted to see it!
I think it is like people who only go to church on Easter and Christmas. They only go to the observatory for big planetary events. (My dad used to take me to the observatory a lot when I was growing up, and it's never crowded on a regular day). So Mars was there but behind a cloud and a tree. We gave up and left, but the line for the big telescope was so long it blocked the parking lot exit. We drove over the curb and made our escape!
Later we looked at Mars in the driveway with a pair of binoculars. It looked like a wiggly bright speck. So I saw it!
THE END
Some thoughts
Why doesn't Blogger have a spell-check? I am a terrible speller, and I am too lazy to paste into word and spellcheck on this slow slow computer. (So if you notice mistakes, that's why)
New Mexico is a beautiful place, but being here reminds me of why I was so eager to leave.
There was a third thing, but now I forget what it was.
Why doesn't Blogger have a spell-check? I am a terrible speller, and I am too lazy to paste into word and spellcheck on this slow slow computer. (So if you notice mistakes, that's why)
New Mexico is a beautiful place, but being here reminds me of why I was so eager to leave.
There was a third thing, but now I forget what it was.
Things My Mom Does That Aggravate Me, Pt. 2
My mom eats junk food even though she knows it will make her sick. In this particular instance, it was a bag of tortilla chips that my stepfather's brother left behind after a visit. When I saw them, I said, "Why don't we throw these away so you don't eat them?" She said, "I won't eat them."
A little while later I came into the kitchen to find her eating the chips. "You shouldn't eat those chips because they will make you sick," I observed. "I'm only eating a few," she said.
About three hours later, she started saying things like: "Ooooooh, I'm so sick! My stomach hurts! Why did I eat all of those chips? Oh, my stomach!" Etc.
This happens so often that I have long ago learned that there is nothing to be done about it. But it annoys the hell out of me.
My mom eats junk food even though she knows it will make her sick. In this particular instance, it was a bag of tortilla chips that my stepfather's brother left behind after a visit. When I saw them, I said, "Why don't we throw these away so you don't eat them?" She said, "I won't eat them."
A little while later I came into the kitchen to find her eating the chips. "You shouldn't eat those chips because they will make you sick," I observed. "I'm only eating a few," she said.
About three hours later, she started saying things like: "Ooooooh, I'm so sick! My stomach hurts! Why did I eat all of those chips? Oh, my stomach!" Etc.
This happens so often that I have long ago learned that there is nothing to be done about it. But it annoys the hell out of me.
martedì, agosto 26, 2003
The robots, again
Scientists have been given the biggest ever grant to build a "conscious robot".
Do you think this is possible? Do you think this is a good idea?
Scientists have been given the biggest ever grant to build a "conscious robot".
Do you think this is possible? Do you think this is a good idea?
Coffee Addict
Who says coffee addiction is something modern? Even JS Bach needed his caffeine!
Lyrics to Bach's Coffee Cantata
Bach's Coffee Cantata BWV 211
Libretto by Christian Friedrich Henrici
Composed for perfomance by Bach's Collegium at Zimmerman's Coffee House, Leipzig, between 1732 & 1734
Recitative Narrator
Be quiet, stop chattering, and pay attention to what's taking place: here comes Herr Schlendrian with his daughter Lieschen; he's growling like a honey bear. Hear for yourselves, what she has done to him!
Aria - Schlendrian
Don't one's children cause one endless trials & tribulations! What I say each day to my daughter Lieschen falls on stony ground.
Recitative - Schlendrian
You wicked child, you disobedient girl, h! when will I get my way; give up coffee!
Lieschen
Father, don't be so severe! f I can't drink my bowl of coffee three times daily, then in my torment I will shrivel up like a piece of roast goat.
Aria - Lieschen
Mm! how sweet the coffee tastes, more delicious than a thousand kisses, mellower than muscatel wine. Coffee, coffee I must have, and if someone wishes to give me a treat, ah, then pour me out some coffee!
Recitative - Schlendrian
If you don't give up drinking coffee then you shan't go to any wedding feast, nor go out walking. oh! when will I get my way; give up coffee!
Lieschen
Oh well! Just leave me my coffee!
Schlendrian
Now I've got the little minx! I won't get you a whalebone skirt in the latest fashion.
Lieschen
I can easily live with that.
Schlendrian
You're not to stand at the window and watch people pass by!
Lieschen
That as well, only I beg of you, leave me my coffee!
Schlendrian
Furthermore, you shan't be getting any silver or gold ribbon for your bonnet from me!
Lieschen
Yes, yes! only leave me to my pleasure!
Schlendrian
You disobedient Lieschen you, so you go along with it all!
Aria - Schlendrian
Hard-hearted girls are not so easily won over. Yet if one finds their weak spot, ah! then one comes away successful.
Recitative - Schlendrian
Now take heed what your father says!
Lieschen
In everything but the coffee.
Schlendrian
Well then, you'll have to resign yourself to never taking a husband.
Lieschen
Oh yes! Father, a husband!
Schlendrian
I swear it won't happen.
Lieschen
Until I can forgo coffee? From now on, coffee, remain forever untouched! Father, listen, I won't drink any
Schlendrian
Then you shall have a husband at last!
Aria - Lieschen
Today even dear father, see to it! Oh, a husband! Really, that suits me splendidly! If it could only happen soon that at last, before I go to bed, instead of coffee I were to get a proper lover!
Recitative - Narrator
Old Schlendrian goes off to see if he can find a husband forthwith for his daughter Lieschen; but Leischen secretly lets it be known: no suitor is to come to my house unless he promises me, and it is also written into the marriage contract, that I will be permitted to make myself coffee whenever I want.
Trio
A cat won't stop from catching mice, and maidens remain faithful to their coffee. The mother holds her coffee dear, the grandmother drank it also, who can thus rebuke the daughters!
Yes, this is an actual Bach piece, though reportedly "not his best work" (according to my dad). Lyrics from good-music-guide.com, where you can also find it in the original German.
Who says coffee addiction is something modern? Even JS Bach needed his caffeine!
Lyrics to Bach's Coffee Cantata
Bach's Coffee Cantata BWV 211
Libretto by Christian Friedrich Henrici
Composed for perfomance by Bach's Collegium at Zimmerman's Coffee House, Leipzig, between 1732 & 1734
Recitative Narrator
Be quiet, stop chattering, and pay attention to what's taking place: here comes Herr Schlendrian with his daughter Lieschen; he's growling like a honey bear. Hear for yourselves, what she has done to him!
Aria - Schlendrian
Don't one's children cause one endless trials & tribulations! What I say each day to my daughter Lieschen falls on stony ground.
Recitative - Schlendrian
You wicked child, you disobedient girl, h! when will I get my way; give up coffee!
Lieschen
Father, don't be so severe! f I can't drink my bowl of coffee three times daily, then in my torment I will shrivel up like a piece of roast goat.
Aria - Lieschen
Mm! how sweet the coffee tastes, more delicious than a thousand kisses, mellower than muscatel wine. Coffee, coffee I must have, and if someone wishes to give me a treat, ah, then pour me out some coffee!
Recitative - Schlendrian
If you don't give up drinking coffee then you shan't go to any wedding feast, nor go out walking. oh! when will I get my way; give up coffee!
Lieschen
Oh well! Just leave me my coffee!
Schlendrian
Now I've got the little minx! I won't get you a whalebone skirt in the latest fashion.
Lieschen
I can easily live with that.
Schlendrian
You're not to stand at the window and watch people pass by!
Lieschen
That as well, only I beg of you, leave me my coffee!
Schlendrian
Furthermore, you shan't be getting any silver or gold ribbon for your bonnet from me!
Lieschen
Yes, yes! only leave me to my pleasure!
Schlendrian
You disobedient Lieschen you, so you go along with it all!
Aria - Schlendrian
Hard-hearted girls are not so easily won over. Yet if one finds their weak spot, ah! then one comes away successful.
Recitative - Schlendrian
Now take heed what your father says!
Lieschen
In everything but the coffee.
Schlendrian
Well then, you'll have to resign yourself to never taking a husband.
Lieschen
Oh yes! Father, a husband!
Schlendrian
I swear it won't happen.
Lieschen
Until I can forgo coffee? From now on, coffee, remain forever untouched! Father, listen, I won't drink any
Schlendrian
Then you shall have a husband at last!
Aria - Lieschen
Today even dear father, see to it! Oh, a husband! Really, that suits me splendidly! If it could only happen soon that at last, before I go to bed, instead of coffee I were to get a proper lover!
Recitative - Narrator
Old Schlendrian goes off to see if he can find a husband forthwith for his daughter Lieschen; but Leischen secretly lets it be known: no suitor is to come to my house unless he promises me, and it is also written into the marriage contract, that I will be permitted to make myself coffee whenever I want.
Trio
A cat won't stop from catching mice, and maidens remain faithful to their coffee. The mother holds her coffee dear, the grandmother drank it also, who can thus rebuke the daughters!
Yes, this is an actual Bach piece, though reportedly "not his best work" (according to my dad). Lyrics from good-music-guide.com, where you can also find it in the original German.
Ha ha I fooled you!
The guesses were good, but nobody discovered which thing about me is false! I was an exchange student in Japan, but it was a YFU summer exchange, so my Japanese never got very good, and I have forgotten everything I learned back then. My driver's license actually says eye color GRN, which stands for green, so that must be true. My toes and fingers do actually seem to add up to ten of each type. And YES I REALLY DO HATE MAYO!
Anyway, I was being sneaky, choosing something extra-mundane:
42.I will be 34 in October. I am 29 and my birthday is in June.
The guesses were good, but nobody discovered which thing about me is false! I was an exchange student in Japan, but it was a YFU summer exchange, so my Japanese never got very good, and I have forgotten everything I learned back then. My driver's license actually says eye color GRN, which stands for green, so that must be true. My toes and fingers do actually seem to add up to ten of each type. And YES I REALLY DO HATE MAYO!
Anyway, I was being sneaky, choosing something extra-mundane:
42.
lunedì, agosto 25, 2003
Don't forget to keep guessing which of the 100 Things About Me (Items 34-50) is not true! I'm not going to tell you until I get some more guesses!
PS. My permalinks are still a little strange. You may end up linked to the end of the post.
PS. My permalinks are still a little strange. You may end up linked to the end of the post.
Experiment
I noticed that Shy Lux has included a place for her "What ads are above my blog right now?" experiment in her sidebar. I think this is a great idea, so you will now find a "What ads are above my blog right now?" experiment feature in my sidebar as well. Please let me know what the google/blogger bot is giving me!! If you have blogger with ads, put an experiment in your blog too!! (If you want to)
I noticed that Shy Lux has included a place for her "What ads are above my blog right now?" experiment in her sidebar. I think this is a great idea, so you will now find a "What ads are above my blog right now?" experiment feature in my sidebar as well. Please let me know what the google/blogger bot is giving me!! If you have blogger with ads, put an experiment in your blog too!! (If you want to)
That's MY Toilet!
I went with my dad to a play at a local theater. I went into the bathroom, and was surprised to find a gold plaque on the door with someone's name on it. Upon further inspection, I noticed that each door had a plaque. They had dedicated the bathroom stalls to donors!
I told my dad about this, and he said he would see if the men's room had the same. And, indeed it did, "right at eye level." My dad had recognized the name above his urinal - it was the host of the local classical music show.
Some questions come to mind. First, when these people donated money, did they know that their names would be on toilets? Second, if one of these people happen to go to the bathroom here, do they get priority for their named toilet? I mean, can they cut the line?
I went with my dad to a play at a local theater. I went into the bathroom, and was surprised to find a gold plaque on the door with someone's name on it. Upon further inspection, I noticed that each door had a plaque. They had dedicated the bathroom stalls to donors!
I told my dad about this, and he said he would see if the men's room had the same. And, indeed it did, "right at eye level." My dad had recognized the name above his urinal - it was the host of the local classical music show.
Some questions come to mind. First, when these people donated money, did they know that their names would be on toilets? Second, if one of these people happen to go to the bathroom here, do they get priority for their named toilet? I mean, can they cut the line?
Satanists and Bears, oh my!
Or, things to be afraid of in Albuquerque
I told my mom that I was going out for a walk. "Be careful!" she said, "There were some satanists caught under a bridge sacrificing a cat!" This freaked me out because the bridge is on my typical walk route. Plus, I felt sad for the cat.
The Albuquerque area also has a problem with bears. In drought years like this one, the bears come down from the mountains in search of food. We had a bear in our back yard once, and so my mom is really afraid of bears now.
As I was walking out the door, my mom was yelling, "Watch out for Satanists!! And Bears!!"
Or, things to be afraid of in Albuquerque
I told my mom that I was going out for a walk. "Be careful!" she said, "There were some satanists caught under a bridge sacrificing a cat!" This freaked me out because the bridge is on my typical walk route. Plus, I felt sad for the cat.
The Albuquerque area also has a problem with bears. In drought years like this one, the bears come down from the mountains in search of food. We had a bear in our back yard once, and so my mom is really afraid of bears now.
As I was walking out the door, my mom was yelling, "Watch out for Satanists!! And Bears!!"
sabato, agosto 23, 2003
100 Things About Me (Items 34-50)
This time it is a little different. One of the items below is not true. Your job is to guess which one!
34. I spent time as a high school exchange student in Japan.
35. I have never broken a bone.
36. I have dyed my hair many colors at some point: black, platinum blonde, "Scully" red, blonde with black tips, brown, green streaks. But never pink or blue.
37. My current hair color would be best described as "the color that grows out of my head" with a few hilights/lighter areas.
38. My mom and I once got in a fight at the motor vehicle department over my eye color (there was a box to check for the driver's license). I said green and she said blue.
39. I still say green. So does my driver's license.
40. My college creative writing class was taught by Pulitzer-Prize winning author Jhumpa Lahiri back when she was "just a graduate student." (Check out her new book)
41. I can type about 60-65 words per minute.
42. I will be 34 in October.
43. I have the normal number of fingers and toes.
44. I have trouble sleeping when it is noisy (ie loud loud music in apartment below, Noisy Saab Bitch driving around, sirens, fireworks, construction work next door, people yelling outside).
45. If I had been a boy, I would have been named "John"
46. I hate mayonnaise!
47. I love subways! Underground public transit fascinates me!
48. I like going up towers. I have been up towers in Paris, Berlin, Tokyo, Seoul, Montreal, various small ones in Italian cities and towns (but not Pisa), and maybe some others I forget. I want to go up the one in Toronto.
49. I grate fresh Parmigiano Reggiano cheese to go on my pasta at home. I am a cheese snob. The green Kraft Parmesan tube makes me cringe.
50. I had braces, but then I got in a car accident, whacked my head, and my teeth were knocked slightly crooked again. Oh well.
This time it is a little different. One of the items below is not true. Your job is to guess which one!
34. I spent time as a high school exchange student in Japan.
35. I have never broken a bone.
36. I have dyed my hair many colors at some point: black, platinum blonde, "Scully" red, blonde with black tips, brown, green streaks. But never pink or blue.
37. My current hair color would be best described as "the color that grows out of my head" with a few hilights/lighter areas.
38. My mom and I once got in a fight at the motor vehicle department over my eye color (there was a box to check for the driver's license). I said green and she said blue.
39. I still say green. So does my driver's license.
40. My college creative writing class was taught by Pulitzer-Prize winning author Jhumpa Lahiri back when she was "just a graduate student." (Check out her new book)
41. I can type about 60-65 words per minute.
42. I will be 34 in October.
43. I have the normal number of fingers and toes.
44. I have trouble sleeping when it is noisy (ie loud loud music in apartment below, Noisy Saab Bitch driving around, sirens, fireworks, construction work next door, people yelling outside).
45. If I had been a boy, I would have been named "John"
46. I hate mayonnaise!
47. I love subways! Underground public transit fascinates me!
48. I like going up towers. I have been up towers in Paris, Berlin, Tokyo, Seoul, Montreal, various small ones in Italian cities and towns (but not Pisa), and maybe some others I forget. I want to go up the one in Toronto.
49. I grate fresh Parmigiano Reggiano cheese to go on my pasta at home. I am a cheese snob. The green Kraft Parmesan tube makes me cringe.
50. I had braces, but then I got in a car accident, whacked my head, and my teeth were knocked slightly crooked again. Oh well.
A Great New Mexico Lunch
I wrote recently that I love hot peppers - the hotter the better! But is is really more accurate to say that my favorite pepper is the New Mexico Green Chile. It is both hot and flavorful. A pepper so hot that you can't taste the food is more of a novelty than a meal.
Today I went to Garcia's, a local restaurant, to have a bowl of green chile and whole beans. This is a great vegetarian meal. It is about 75% green chile and 25% pinto beans. You also get a flour tortilla. The green chile here is quite spicy, so after eating a whole bowl full, my lips burned, my endorphins had kicked in, and I was happy. Add a cup of coffee, and the whole thing cost $5.50. Add a $2 tip (the appropriate ammount seemed too paltry), and it is still cheaper than an East Coast lunch.
Feeling like a New Mexican again.
A very evil email
From: "Microsoft" security@microsoft.com
Date: today
To: me
Subject: Use this patch immediately!
Dear friend , use this Internet Explorer patch now!
There are dangerous virus in the internet now!
More than 500.000 already infected!
The file attached to this email was removed because:
patch.exe infected with W32.Dumaru@mm
----
I opened this email knowing that it was a virus mail because I also knew that my email program had taken off the attachment (message 1k = no more attachment). But just think about how evil this is. Playing on fears of viruses by promising a patch, which is a virus! (The crummy English is also kind of funny.)
Come here, poison dart bot!
-Now I am getting some ads for Manolo Blahnik shoes, which is great, but I haven't talked about those for a long time! Maybe getting off Google does have some impact on the ads?
-I am mostly still getting ads for the same book by the same person. I won't ever write her name here again because I am sick of the ads! I am also getting ads for other similar books that I don't really want around. So, in the future, if I mention TelebimboA, this is this person. She is even obnoxious in the virtual world! I can't get rid of her!
-Scott has recommended here that I mention poison dart frogs to see if I will get an ad for them (he has seen one of these before!). So I will.
I have not given up on the mayo, though, so I will try to mention both of them together to see if that helps:
Recipe of the day:
Poison dart frog mayonnaise casserole
1 vat mayonnaise, Sam's Club brand, xtra-large size
POISON DART FROGS
Corn Smut
surströmming, extra rotten! (link from Volume 22)
Casu Marzu (Sardinian maggot cheese)
A few more poison dart frogs, for garnish
Mix together. Perfect for potlucks!
I wrote recently that I love hot peppers - the hotter the better! But is is really more accurate to say that my favorite pepper is the New Mexico Green Chile. It is both hot and flavorful. A pepper so hot that you can't taste the food is more of a novelty than a meal.
Today I went to Garcia's, a local restaurant, to have a bowl of green chile and whole beans. This is a great vegetarian meal. It is about 75% green chile and 25% pinto beans. You also get a flour tortilla. The green chile here is quite spicy, so after eating a whole bowl full, my lips burned, my endorphins had kicked in, and I was happy. Add a cup of coffee, and the whole thing cost $5.50. Add a $2 tip (the appropriate ammount seemed too paltry), and it is still cheaper than an East Coast lunch.
Feeling like a New Mexican again.
A very evil email
From: "Microsoft" security@microsoft.com
Date: today
To: me
Subject: Use this patch immediately!
Dear friend , use this Internet Explorer patch now!
There are dangerous virus in the internet now!
More than 500.000 already infected!
The file attached to this email was removed because:
patch.exe infected with W32.Dumaru@mm
----
I opened this email knowing that it was a virus mail because I also knew that my email program had taken off the attachment (message 1k = no more attachment). But just think about how evil this is. Playing on fears of viruses by promising a patch, which is a virus! (The crummy English is also kind of funny.)
Come here, poison dart bot!
-Now I am getting some ads for Manolo Blahnik shoes, which is great, but I haven't talked about those for a long time! Maybe getting off Google does have some impact on the ads?
-I am mostly still getting ads for the same book by the same person. I won't ever write her name here again because I am sick of the ads! I am also getting ads for other similar books that I don't really want around. So, in the future, if I mention TelebimboA, this is this person. She is even obnoxious in the virtual world! I can't get rid of her!
-Scott has recommended here that I mention poison dart frogs to see if I will get an ad for them (he has seen one of these before!). So I will.
I want some poison dart frogs! I want to buy poison dart frogs online!
I have not given up on the mayo, though, so I will try to mention both of them together to see if that helps:
Recipe of the day:
Poison dart frog mayonnaise casserole
1 vat mayonnaise, Sam's Club brand, xtra-large size
POISON DART FROGS
Corn Smut
surströmming, extra rotten! (link from Volume 22)
Casu Marzu (Sardinian maggot cheese)
A few more poison dart frogs, for garnish
Mix together. Perfect for potlucks!
venerdì, agosto 22, 2003
The Water Pik Fiasco
My mom is, how shall we say, not particularly techno-savvy. A few years ago when my husband and I came to visit, she managed to blow up her brand-new oven while trying to bake a cheesecake.
This time, I am visiting alone. As soon as I got here, she wanted to show me her new water pik, recommended by the dentist. But she didn't know how to set it up and asked if I would help. Yes, I agreed, I could help. So we got it out and put it down by the bathroom sink. I was able to set it up, so we plugged it in and decided to test it. My mom was holding the nozzle pointing down in the sink, so I switched it on. Water started coming out of the nozzle, as would be expected from a water pik.
For some reason, when water started coming out of the nozzle, it freaked my mom out. She let out a yelp and pulled her hand upward. The result was that water was spurting out at the mirror and splattering all over the place. This freaked her out again, and she moved so that the water was now squirting all over everything on the bathroom counter. By now I was laughing hysterically. Then she noticed that everything was getting wet, so she flung her arm over her shoulder, and as a result she squirted me directly in the face. Luckily, I was able to reach over and turn it off.
So, even though this test didn't go so well, we decided to try again but this time she would squirt her teeth (rather than the entire bathroom). So she aimed the pik at a tooth, and I turned it on again. Only a little water dribbled out this time, so I went to adjust the water reservoir. This worked, and water started squirting out of the nozzle onto her tooth. This freaked her out yet again, she pulled the pik away from her tooth, and she squirted herself with water.
So maybe she needs a little more practice with the water pik before she gets optimal usage out of the thing.
My mom is, how shall we say, not particularly techno-savvy. A few years ago when my husband and I came to visit, she managed to blow up her brand-new oven while trying to bake a cheesecake.
This time, I am visiting alone. As soon as I got here, she wanted to show me her new water pik, recommended by the dentist. But she didn't know how to set it up and asked if I would help. Yes, I agreed, I could help. So we got it out and put it down by the bathroom sink. I was able to set it up, so we plugged it in and decided to test it. My mom was holding the nozzle pointing down in the sink, so I switched it on. Water started coming out of the nozzle, as would be expected from a water pik.
For some reason, when water started coming out of the nozzle, it freaked my mom out. She let out a yelp and pulled her hand upward. The result was that water was spurting out at the mirror and splattering all over the place. This freaked her out again, and she moved so that the water was now squirting all over everything on the bathroom counter. By now I was laughing hysterically. Then she noticed that everything was getting wet, so she flung her arm over her shoulder, and as a result she squirted me directly in the face. Luckily, I was able to reach over and turn it off.
So, even though this test didn't go so well, we decided to try again but this time she would squirt her teeth (rather than the entire bathroom). So she aimed the pik at a tooth, and I turned it on again. Only a little water dribbled out this time, so I went to adjust the water reservoir. This worked, and water started squirting out of the nozzle onto her tooth. This freaked her out yet again, she pulled the pik away from her tooth, and she squirted herself with water.
So maybe she needs a little more practice with the water pik before she gets optimal usage out of the thing.
I have been very spoiled having a fast computer and a fast cable internet connection. It is like the middle ages here with dialup! (The dark ages, of course, are what you get in the blackout)
Things my Mother Does to Aggravate Me/Push my Buttons, Part 1
My parents have been divorced for over 15 years, and they are both remarried. My mom has a way of sneaking in little questions about my dad and his wife, which makes me very uncomfortable. It reminds me of the not-so-great divorce days when I was caught in the middle.
Tonight she was very subtle. First she asked me how long my husband and I had been married. "Almost 4 years," I said. "How long have I been married?" She asked. We counted up, and it has been 8 years. "We're happily married, don't we seem happily married?" she asked. "Yes, you do." "Then, how long has your dad been married? A long time, right?" Yes, I agreed, a long time (about 10 years). "Is he still happily married?"
There it is. The question. What am I supposed to say here? The truth? (The truth, which everyone can easily tell, is that both of my parents are much much happier in their second marriages). This will just upset my mom because she really seems to resent my stepmother, even though my dad didn't even meet her until my parents had alredy been divorced for a while (no, absolutely no overlap). The other truth? (The other truth is "it's really none of your business, and I wish you wouldn't ask me that type of question because it makes me very uncomfortable"). Well, I said my not quite diplomatic standard, "I don't know. Maybe you should call him up and ask!"
Irritated, she said, "Well, I just asked you if his marriage was still happy. That's all."
My parents have been divorced for over 15 years, and they are both remarried. My mom has a way of sneaking in little questions about my dad and his wife, which makes me very uncomfortable. It reminds me of the not-so-great divorce days when I was caught in the middle.
Tonight she was very subtle. First she asked me how long my husband and I had been married. "Almost 4 years," I said. "How long have I been married?" She asked. We counted up, and it has been 8 years. "We're happily married, don't we seem happily married?" she asked. "Yes, you do." "Then, how long has your dad been married? A long time, right?" Yes, I agreed, a long time (about 10 years). "Is he still happily married?"
There it is. The question. What am I supposed to say here? The truth? (The truth, which everyone can easily tell, is that both of my parents are much much happier in their second marriages). This will just upset my mom because she really seems to resent my stepmother, even though my dad didn't even meet her until my parents had alredy been divorced for a while (no, absolutely no overlap). The other truth? (The other truth is "it's really none of your business, and I wish you wouldn't ask me that type of question because it makes me very uncomfortable"). Well, I said my not quite diplomatic standard, "I don't know. Maybe you should call him up and ask!"
Irritated, she said, "Well, I just asked you if his marriage was still happy. That's all."
And Google Used To Be My Friend...
A few people have already linked to this info. on Counter-Googling. In other words, it is a "trend" for companies to use google to find information about people and then sell them things. Blogs are targeted in particular: "Best chance of hitting the data-jackpot? Three million or so bloggers: consumers who keep an Internet diary, revealing to all the world their commercial preferences, daily doings, recent holiday photos, habits and customs, family matters and what have you. And what about millions and millions of online resumes, showing detailed career paths, marital status and 'life and work objectives'? ;-)"
Of course, more and more bloggers are metatagging their way off Google, which might help at least a little bit. The counter-googling described above also appears to necessitate a real person to read your blog, which is time consuming enough to keep it to a minimum for the moment. It's when the computer starts collecting keyword information that we have to worry about large-scale nosy marketing.
I have been known to complain about the blogger/google targeted ads at the top of my blog (Read it here. you might have to scroll up). In particular, it seems as though the ads in no way account for the context in which a keyword is found. Sometimes it works and sometimes not so much.
Worked:
-Ads for clam chowder after I said I liked it
So-So:
-Ads for Neti Pot after I told of my Neti nasal geyser
-some random ones
Didn't Work:
-Ads for Treason and a variety of ultra-right books and bookstores after I complained about Ann Coulter
-Ads for smoker's rights in Cambridge after I complained about a smoker in Cambridge (though that post was a bit subtle, I must admit)
Some experimentation is at hand:
1. Shy Lux, reflecting on this phenomenon here, has suggested that her readers tell her what ads they find at the top of her blog. I like this idea, so you are welcome to do so here as well. {Oooooohh, maybe we can start our own "meme"!}
2. I wonder if mentioning something enough times will get you an ad for it, regardless of context. So I'll try here and watch the ads:
I hate mayonnaise. Mayonnaise is disgusting. Alien snot and mayonnaise are the same. I do not want any mayonnaise on my sandwich, but thank you for asking. I hate mayonnaise. Mayonnaise is disgusting. Alien snot and mayonnaise are the same. I do not want any mayonnaise on my sandwich, but thank you for asking. I hate mayonnaise. Mayonnaise is disgusting. Alien snot and mayonnaise are the same. I do not want any mayonnaise on my sandwich, but thank you for asking. I hate mayonnaise. Mayonnaise is disgusting. Alien snot and mayonnaise are the same. I do not want any mayonnaise on my sandwich, but thank you for asking. NO MAYONNAISE!
PS I really don't like mayonnaise, can you tell?
Related Links (in case the bot likes links better): The Worldwide I Hate Mayonnaise Club! and Hellmann's, a company that makes glop I hate.
A few people have already linked to this info. on Counter-Googling. In other words, it is a "trend" for companies to use google to find information about people and then sell them things. Blogs are targeted in particular: "Best chance of hitting the data-jackpot? Three million or so bloggers: consumers who keep an Internet diary, revealing to all the world their commercial preferences, daily doings, recent holiday photos, habits and customs, family matters and what have you. And what about millions and millions of online resumes, showing detailed career paths, marital status and 'life and work objectives'? ;-)"
Of course, more and more bloggers are metatagging their way off Google, which might help at least a little bit. The counter-googling described above also appears to necessitate a real person to read your blog, which is time consuming enough to keep it to a minimum for the moment. It's when the computer starts collecting keyword information that we have to worry about large-scale nosy marketing.
I have been known to complain about the blogger/google targeted ads at the top of my blog (Read it here. you might have to scroll up). In particular, it seems as though the ads in no way account for the context in which a keyword is found. Sometimes it works and sometimes not so much.
Worked:
-Ads for clam chowder after I said I liked it
So-So:
-Ads for Neti Pot after I told of my Neti nasal geyser
-some random ones
Didn't Work:
-Ads for Treason and a variety of ultra-right books and bookstores after I complained about Ann Coulter
-Ads for smoker's rights in Cambridge after I complained about a smoker in Cambridge (though that post was a bit subtle, I must admit)
Some experimentation is at hand:
1. Shy Lux, reflecting on this phenomenon here, has suggested that her readers tell her what ads they find at the top of her blog. I like this idea, so you are welcome to do so here as well. {Oooooohh, maybe we can start our own "meme"!}
2. I wonder if mentioning something enough times will get you an ad for it, regardless of context. So I'll try here and watch the ads:
I hate mayonnaise. Mayonnaise is disgusting. Alien snot and mayonnaise are the same. I do not want any mayonnaise on my sandwich, but thank you for asking. I hate mayonnaise. Mayonnaise is disgusting. Alien snot and mayonnaise are the same. I do not want any mayonnaise on my sandwich, but thank you for asking. I hate mayonnaise. Mayonnaise is disgusting. Alien snot and mayonnaise are the same. I do not want any mayonnaise on my sandwich, but thank you for asking. I hate mayonnaise. Mayonnaise is disgusting. Alien snot and mayonnaise are the same. I do not want any mayonnaise on my sandwich, but thank you for asking. NO MAYONNAISE!
PS I really don't like mayonnaise, can you tell?
Related Links (in case the bot likes links better): The Worldwide I Hate Mayonnaise Club! and Hellmann's, a company that makes glop I hate.
giovedì, agosto 21, 2003
I spent today flying from RI to Albuquerque NM to visit my childhood home. So I will be posting from this VERY SLOW computer for a while. Future posts will probably include one or more of the following: The Joys of Air Travel, part 2. More of the 100 Things About Me. And, of course, Things my Mother Does to Aggravate Me/Push my Buttons (I anticipate a multipart series!). Please remind me to clear the browser history frequently!
Also, if anyone wants an interview, speak up! I won't ask any embarassing questions! I promise! (unless you want me to. please specify).
Also, if anyone wants an interview, speak up! I won't ask any embarassing questions! I promise! (unless you want me to. please specify).
martedì, agosto 19, 2003
Interview!
When I saw Mala's interview on Wrong Side of Happiness, I decided to ask her to interview me as well.
The rules:
Mala provided me with the following 5 questions, and here are my answers:
1. You're given the power to reproduce one movie. Which would you select and how would you change it?
This question immediately brought to mind all the times when awful movies are made from excellent books. In particular, it is very frustrating when the movie changes the book around and, basically, ruins it. So, following this theme, I would pick:
The Serpent and the Rainbow. This was one of my favorite books growing up. It had everything: Adventure! Psychopharmacology! Plants! Spirit possession! Museums! Travel! Blowfish! I was excited when I heard it was going to become a movie, but the movie turned out to be some crummy zombie horror thing that had very little to do with the book. So, I would re-make this to accurately represent the book. It would not be a horror movie, and it would not have a horror movie director. It would be more like a National Geographic documentary (which is where the author works, anyway).
Runners-up:
--Girl, Interrupted. The book was excellent. The movie was overblown, melodramatic, and inaccurate. Maybe it’s just best not to make movies out of people’s memoirs. And don’t put Winona Ryder in it, either.
--Hannibal. Why did you do that to the ending, movie people? Read the book instead. Watch Anthony Hopkins in Silence of the Lambs instead.
2. If you were elected Mayor of Providence, what would be your first three acts in office?
This is a great question!
First, I would watch my back. Politics in Providence can be a brutal game.
Second, I would get rid of the no-parking-on-the-street-at-night law. I have never understood this law. Other cities manage to have parking on the street at night. In essence, this law penalizes apartment-dwellers and people with small garageless houses. I’d get rid of it.
Third, I would make friends with Mike Stanton, the Providence Journal reporter and Buddy book author. Because if he writes a tell-all book about a mayor, wow, does it tell all!
So, as you can see, I would make a terrible mayor. Only one of the three things has anything to do with the city! Good thing I am not in politics.
3. Someone develops an elixir that would grant you eternal life. Would you drink it? Why or why not?
This question is very difficult. I had to think about this one quite a bit.
I would not drink it. Even though growing old and dying may be frightening, I think it is the way things were meant to be. Also, I do think that eternal life would be very lonely and somewhat boring.
But, just out of curiosity, does this elixir have an expiration date? Can I keep it in the medicine cabinet just in case I change my mind later?
4. Define beauty and provide examples from your life.
I think real beauty is found in the combination of kindness and elegance. My image of this combination comes from my grandmother, who passed away about 10 years ago. She knew how to find the right balance between taking care of herself and taking care of others. Even when her health was bad, she retained both an effortless elegance and a giving kindness.
5. If you could wake up tomorrow with one new talent, what would it be?
There are plenty of talents I would like to have, including both practical and frivolous things. But in order to take advantage of the rapid overnight feature, I’d like to pick one that would be very difficult and time consuming (or impossible) to learn otherwise. So, I will have to pick a sports-related talent since I have always been non-athletic. Since I like playing tennis, but I am distinctly untalented, I would choose a tennis-playing talent. That way I can play more without feeling like a klutz all the time!
Thank you Mala for the great questions! If there is anyone who wants to be interviewed by me, now is your chance!
When I saw Mala's interview on Wrong Side of Happiness, I decided to ask her to interview me as well.
The rules:
- If you want to participate, leave me a comment saying "interview me."
- I will respond by asking you five questions - each person's will be different.
- You will update your journal with the answers to the questions.
- You will include this explanation and an offer to interview others in the same post.
- When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.
Mala provided me with the following 5 questions, and here are my answers:
1. You're given the power to reproduce one movie. Which would you select and how would you change it?
This question immediately brought to mind all the times when awful movies are made from excellent books. In particular, it is very frustrating when the movie changes the book around and, basically, ruins it. So, following this theme, I would pick:
The Serpent and the Rainbow. This was one of my favorite books growing up. It had everything: Adventure! Psychopharmacology! Plants! Spirit possession! Museums! Travel! Blowfish! I was excited when I heard it was going to become a movie, but the movie turned out to be some crummy zombie horror thing that had very little to do with the book. So, I would re-make this to accurately represent the book. It would not be a horror movie, and it would not have a horror movie director. It would be more like a National Geographic documentary (which is where the author works, anyway).
Runners-up:
--Girl, Interrupted. The book was excellent. The movie was overblown, melodramatic, and inaccurate. Maybe it’s just best not to make movies out of people’s memoirs. And don’t put Winona Ryder in it, either.
--Hannibal. Why did you do that to the ending, movie people? Read the book instead. Watch Anthony Hopkins in Silence of the Lambs instead.
2. If you were elected Mayor of Providence, what would be your first three acts in office?
This is a great question!
First, I would watch my back. Politics in Providence can be a brutal game.
Second, I would get rid of the no-parking-on-the-street-at-night law. I have never understood this law. Other cities manage to have parking on the street at night. In essence, this law penalizes apartment-dwellers and people with small garageless houses. I’d get rid of it.
Third, I would make friends with Mike Stanton, the Providence Journal reporter and Buddy book author. Because if he writes a tell-all book about a mayor, wow, does it tell all!
So, as you can see, I would make a terrible mayor. Only one of the three things has anything to do with the city! Good thing I am not in politics.
3. Someone develops an elixir that would grant you eternal life. Would you drink it? Why or why not?
This question is very difficult. I had to think about this one quite a bit.
I would not drink it. Even though growing old and dying may be frightening, I think it is the way things were meant to be. Also, I do think that eternal life would be very lonely and somewhat boring.
But, just out of curiosity, does this elixir have an expiration date? Can I keep it in the medicine cabinet just in case I change my mind later?
4. Define beauty and provide examples from your life.
I think real beauty is found in the combination of kindness and elegance. My image of this combination comes from my grandmother, who passed away about 10 years ago. She knew how to find the right balance between taking care of herself and taking care of others. Even when her health was bad, she retained both an effortless elegance and a giving kindness.
5. If you could wake up tomorrow with one new talent, what would it be?
There are plenty of talents I would like to have, including both practical and frivolous things. But in order to take advantage of the rapid overnight feature, I’d like to pick one that would be very difficult and time consuming (or impossible) to learn otherwise. So, I will have to pick a sports-related talent since I have always been non-athletic. Since I like playing tennis, but I am distinctly untalented, I would choose a tennis-playing talent. That way I can play more without feeling like a klutz all the time!
Thank you Mala for the great questions! If there is anyone who wants to be interviewed by me, now is your chance!
Image of the day: Map of the World, from Giornale Nuovo. (in English, no worries).
Last bit of Meta:
- I'm glad I put in the backup comments, because about 5 minutes later, Haloscan disappeared again (it's back again now). Feel free to use whichever comment system you like, or as is frequently the case, whichever one is actually there at any given moment. Right now, in fact, Squawkbox is gone. No, now it's back. Sigh.
- I got the main page off Google, but it still finds pages from my archive. Does anyone know how to fix this? The template didn't have the metatags when those were created.
Last bit of Meta:
- I'm glad I put in the backup comments, because about 5 minutes later, Haloscan disappeared again (it's back again now). Feel free to use whichever comment system you like, or as is frequently the case, whichever one is actually there at any given moment. Right now, in fact, Squawkbox is gone. No, now it's back. Sigh.
- I got the main page off Google, but it still finds pages from my archive. Does anyone know how to fix this? The template didn't have the metatags when those were created.
lunedì, agosto 18, 2003
OK, blogroll in place. It is currently in "random" order, and links will change order on each reload. This may get annoying, we'll see.
Postmodern-style-medium-as-message-meta-commentary
TeleBimbo update: An Open Letter to Ann Coulter. From McSweeney's.
- The permalinks appear to work again. It must have been a Blogger problem. I’ve moved them to the beginning of the post rather than the end to make referencing an individual post more clear-cut.
- I have added a new "rip" motif, which is meant to evoke the "thrown together" style of this blog. (Someone whose graphics editor is Paint can't really aspire to a coherent design, now can she?)
- I am going to put in a Blogroll to organize my ever-increasing number of links. I am also going to link some Italian blogs because I need to practice reading Italian more often.
- Even though the Haloscan comments are unreliable, I have decided for the moment not to add a backup system. I just don’t get enough comments to justify two comment systems.
TeleBimbo update: An Open Letter to Ann Coulter. From McSweeney's.
domenica, agosto 17, 2003
On Smoking in Public Places
Even though I don't smoke, and I don't like secondhand smoke, I still feel that many of the recent laws banning smoking in public places are excessive. Banning smoking in all bars and clubs seems particularly draconian. This is what I believe in theory. But sometimes reality has a way of disrupting this type of viewpoint.
An example occurred Friday at the Cabaret Diosa show (which was great, by the way! The opening band Lovewhip was also a lot of fun). Boston has banned smoking, but apparently Cambridge has not. Even though we were packed into the House of Blues pretty tightly, people were still lighting up. One such person was the guy in front of me. He held his cigarette directly in my face. He wasn't even smoking the damn thing, just holding it in my face and periodically tapping some ashes on my foot. It was basically an annoying prop that just happened to be on fire.
At times like these, I start to think that banning smoking everywhere is a good idea after all.**
**My apologies to the smokers reading this, because I know you would never hold a cigarette in someone's face all night. Right?
It's noisy in here!
I was surprised to find that the band's lead singer was about 7 months pregnant and really showing. She seemed to be carrying it well, though, with her maternity cocktail dress and high heels.
I feel a little like a bad feminist for thinking it, but I can't help but wonder what all that loud music does to fetal development. Is she going to have a baby with malformed eardrums? If the music is so loud that I need earplugs (and I did), it must have some effect. The secondhand smoke couldn't be good either.
I hate the way that much of society sees pregnant women as some sort of host organism, and I know that they have their own lives and careers and things to do. But if I were pregnant, I know I would be paranoid about avoiding smoke, pollution, loud noises, and lots of other things.
I guess in the end it is none of my business. Perhaps I am too uptight to ever be a pregnant woman.
Real-world documentation link of the week: The Blackout phone-photo moblog. Link from Evhead, the Pyra guy.
I can't imagine why they are remaking Coupling. The original BBC series is hilariously funny, but the preview for the new NBC version looks awful. Why can't they just show the British version on NBC? It's in English. I think the American people can cope with a few unfamiliar British terms. If not, it's time to learn how.
100 Things About Me (Items 31-33)
31. I am usually on time for everything (except sometimes really early in the morning - see # 16). Even when I try to be late, I usually fail and show up on time anyway.
32. I hate messy food. I hate having food on my face.
33. I hate to eat standing up.
Even though I don't smoke, and I don't like secondhand smoke, I still feel that many of the recent laws banning smoking in public places are excessive. Banning smoking in all bars and clubs seems particularly draconian. This is what I believe in theory. But sometimes reality has a way of disrupting this type of viewpoint.
An example occurred Friday at the Cabaret Diosa show (which was great, by the way! The opening band Lovewhip was also a lot of fun). Boston has banned smoking, but apparently Cambridge has not. Even though we were packed into the House of Blues pretty tightly, people were still lighting up. One such person was the guy in front of me. He held his cigarette directly in my face. He wasn't even smoking the damn thing, just holding it in my face and periodically tapping some ashes on my foot. It was basically an annoying prop that just happened to be on fire.
At times like these, I start to think that banning smoking everywhere is a good idea after all.**
**My apologies to the smokers reading this, because I know you would never hold a cigarette in someone's face all night. Right?
It's noisy in here!
I was surprised to find that the band's lead singer was about 7 months pregnant and really showing. She seemed to be carrying it well, though, with her maternity cocktail dress and high heels.
I feel a little like a bad feminist for thinking it, but I can't help but wonder what all that loud music does to fetal development. Is she going to have a baby with malformed eardrums? If the music is so loud that I need earplugs (and I did), it must have some effect. The secondhand smoke couldn't be good either.
I hate the way that much of society sees pregnant women as some sort of host organism, and I know that they have their own lives and careers and things to do. But if I were pregnant, I know I would be paranoid about avoiding smoke, pollution, loud noises, and lots of other things.
I guess in the end it is none of my business. Perhaps I am too uptight to ever be a pregnant woman.
Real-world documentation link of the week: The Blackout phone-photo moblog. Link from Evhead, the Pyra guy.
I can't imagine why they are remaking Coupling. The original BBC series is hilariously funny, but the preview for the new NBC version looks awful. Why can't they just show the British version on NBC? It's in English. I think the American people can cope with a few unfamiliar British terms. If not, it's time to learn how.
100 Things About Me (Items 31-33)
31. I am usually on time for everything (except sometimes really early in the morning - see # 16). Even when I try to be late, I usually fail and show up on time anyway.
32. I hate messy food. I hate having food on my face.
33. I hate to eat standing up.
venerdì, agosto 15, 2003
100 Things About Me (Items 13-30)
13. I have been to 47 of the 50 states. I am still missing Idaho, South Dakota, and Wisconsin.
14. I am addicted to caffeine.
15. I have studied many foreign languages (Spanish, French, Japanese, Korean, and Italian), but Italian is the only one I speak well.
16. I am not a morning person.
17. Leno or Letterman? Letterman
18. I am a terrible speller. I am thankful for spell-check.
19. I love hot peppers! The hotter the better!
20. My mother’s sister’s husband’s brother invented the Klingon language.
21. One time in a grocery store I found a sack full of cash on the ground. I turned it in to the manager.
22. The Land of the Lost was my favorite TV show (a long time ago). But then it went away :(
23. I have never been stung by a bee.
24. I learned to drive on my dad’s hand-me-down 1979 Caprice classic with the big 350 V8 engine. That was the best car ever.
25. Even though I would drive really fast in the Caprice, the only time I ever got a speeding ticket was in a GEO METRO with 3 cylinders. Driving from NM to RI with my husband, I was on the freeway in the middle of nowhere in Tennessee. Semi trucks were passing me! The Geo literally can’t go over 85 mph, and even at that speed it feels like it will shake apart. I got stopped for going 5 miles over the limit, and the ticket was $125. Revenue-generating scam, anyone?
26. I believe in Feng Shui, at least some of the time.
27. I once quit a job I hated by leaving a message on their answering machine and never coming back.
28. I love the ocean.
29. Clam chowder** is one of my favorite foods, but
30. I also miss New Mexican food.
**And the Rhode Island version too: Quahog chowder.
13. I have been to 47 of the 50 states. I am still missing Idaho, South Dakota, and Wisconsin.
14. I am addicted to caffeine.
15. I have studied many foreign languages (Spanish, French, Japanese, Korean, and Italian), but Italian is the only one I speak well.
16. I am not a morning person.
17. Leno or Letterman? Letterman
18. I am a terrible speller. I am thankful for spell-check.
19. I love hot peppers! The hotter the better!
20. My mother’s sister’s husband’s brother invented the Klingon language.
21. One time in a grocery store I found a sack full of cash on the ground. I turned it in to the manager.
22. The Land of the Lost was my favorite TV show (a long time ago). But then it went away :(
23. I have never been stung by a bee.
24. I learned to drive on my dad’s hand-me-down 1979 Caprice classic with the big 350 V8 engine. That was the best car ever.
25. Even though I would drive really fast in the Caprice, the only time I ever got a speeding ticket was in a GEO METRO with 3 cylinders. Driving from NM to RI with my husband, I was on the freeway in the middle of nowhere in Tennessee. Semi trucks were passing me! The Geo literally can’t go over 85 mph, and even at that speed it feels like it will shake apart. I got stopped for going 5 miles over the limit, and the ticket was $125. Revenue-generating scam, anyone?
26. I believe in Feng Shui, at least some of the time.
27. I once quit a job I hated by leaving a message on their answering machine and never coming back.
28. I love the ocean.
29. Clam chowder** is one of my favorite foods, but
30. I also miss New Mexican food.
**And the Rhode Island version too: Quahog chowder.
Google searches
When I switched my template, my Sitemeter button got messed up, and I put in the HTML one rather than the Java. I finally got around to fixing it, and so I get site referral information again, including Google searches. Some recent ones:
-- pictures of corn – You came to the right place.
-- corn smut recipes – try here instead. Or buy it pre-made from Goya.
-- mcdonalds worker nude – sorry, none of those here. Just us robots.
-- jon lovitz habitual liar – I still don’t know if it was based on Buddy!
-- sara cucumber - hmmmm
When I switched my template, my Sitemeter button got messed up, and I put in the HTML one rather than the Java. I finally got around to fixing it, and so I get site referral information again, including Google searches. Some recent ones:
-- pictures of corn – You came to the right place.
-- corn smut recipes – try here instead. Or buy it pre-made from Goya.
-- mcdonalds worker nude – sorry, none of those here. Just us robots.
-- jon lovitz habitual liar – I still don’t know if it was based on Buddy!
-- sara cucumber - hmmmm
Good Music and Nepotism
Anyone in the Providence or Boston areas should consider seeing Cabaret Diosa tonight at the House of Blues in Cambridge. The music is great and the show is a lot of fun. Yes, I am related to one of the band members, but I am not related to any of the other 9, so I am at least somewhat impartial!
Watch their mini movie! (fast connection, slow connection).
Anyone in the Providence or Boston areas should consider seeing Cabaret Diosa tonight at the House of Blues in Cambridge. The music is great and the show is a lot of fun. Yes, I am related to one of the band members, but I am not related to any of the other 9, so I am at least somewhat impartial!
Watch their mini movie! (fast connection, slow connection).
I am thankful that Providence was not affected by the blackout. I hope that everyone in NY and the Great Lakes areas will have power back soon and that the blackout will cause as little chaos as possible. The best of luck to everyone!
giovedì, agosto 14, 2003
Is this what you were expecting?
This is a picture of real corn smut:
It is a fungus that grows on corn and causes the kernels to take on this lovely appearance. It is also eaten in Mexico, called huitlacoche or cuitlacoche (read more here or here or here. For an electon microscope image, try here). Yes, I have eaten this myself, in the form of a mole sauce. It was pretty good.
Question: What wierd things have you eaten?
Corn Smut link that is much wierder than anything I will ever have here: I found this corn smut riddle on the Nth page of a google search. I absolutely recommend it, it is one of the most bizarre things I have seen in a long time. In fact, go to this page too. Most of the site doesn't work, adding to its allure. I have absolutely nothing to do with this site.
Question 2: Seriously, click on the corn smut riddle link and tell me what you think.
This is a picture of real corn smut:
It is a fungus that grows on corn and causes the kernels to take on this lovely appearance. It is also eaten in Mexico, called huitlacoche or cuitlacoche (read more here or here or here. For an electon microscope image, try here). Yes, I have eaten this myself, in the form of a mole sauce. It was pretty good.
Question: What wierd things have you eaten?
Corn Smut link that is much wierder than anything I will ever have here: I found this corn smut riddle on the Nth page of a google search. I absolutely recommend it, it is one of the most bizarre things I have seen in a long time. In fact, go to this page too. Most of the site doesn't work, adding to its allure. I have absolutely nothing to do with this site.
Question 2: Seriously, click on the corn smut riddle link and tell me what you think.
100 Things About Me (Items 8-12)
8. I hate square pizza. Pizza should be round!
9. I have been happily married for almost 4 years.
10. I was the only girl in my high school auto mechanics class.
11. I have 4 tattoos. I got the first one right after my 18th birthday and the fourth one about 2 years ago.
12. Ally McBeal was my favorite TV show, but then it went away :(
8. I hate square pizza. Pizza should be round!
9. I have been happily married for almost 4 years.
10. I was the only girl in my high school auto mechanics class.
11. I have 4 tattoos. I got the first one right after my 18th birthday and the fourth one about 2 years ago.
12. Ally McBeal was my favorite TV show, but then it went away :(
mercoledì, agosto 13, 2003
Owie!
I had a minor surgery on my arm this morning. It went fine, but it is now difficult to type.
More later.
Serious link of the day: Proposal of the Physicians' Working Group for Single-Payer National Health Insurance (Abstract). From JAMA.
I had a minor surgery on my arm this morning. It went fine, but it is now difficult to type.
More later.
Serious link of the day: Proposal of the Physicians' Working Group for Single-Payer National Health Insurance (Abstract). From JAMA.
martedì, agosto 12, 2003
100 Things About Me (Items 1-7)
Seeing how Mala has produced 100 things about herself all in one day, I am inspired to try some myself. But being not so ambitious today, I am only going to think of 7, and then if I feel like it, I will add more in future installments.
1. I am an only child.
2. I had a fish tank when I was young, but then I saw some of the fish eat their own babies. I have never had a fish tank since then.
3. I once did a science fair project where I electrocuted plants. They died.
4. I love to garden! I haven’t electrocuted any plants since then! I promise!
5. I really do floss every single day.
6. I am not in the least bit athletic. I was the "classic nerdy girl" picked last for every team in PE class.
7. Except that I don’t wear glasses.
7a (bonus!). Or except when my best friend was team captain. She would pick me no matter what.
Stay tuned for the next installment!
Seeing how Mala has produced 100 things about herself all in one day, I am inspired to try some myself. But being not so ambitious today, I am only going to think of 7, and then if I feel like it, I will add more in future installments.
1. I am an only child.
2. I had a fish tank when I was young, but then I saw some of the fish eat their own babies. I have never had a fish tank since then.
3. I once did a science fair project where I electrocuted plants. They died.
4. I love to garden! I haven’t electrocuted any plants since then! I promise!
5. I really do floss every single day.
6. I am not in the least bit athletic. I was the "classic nerdy girl" picked last for every team in PE class.
7. Except that I don’t wear glasses.
7a (bonus!). Or except when my best friend was team captain. She would pick me no matter what.
Stay tuned for the next installment!
Illegal Art of the Day: "The Symbolic Lotus of A Thousand Colonels" This whole site is worth a look - illegal-art.org.
VegiErotic Link of the Day: Vegan Porn. (Thank you Shy Lux for this link!).
VegiErotic Link of the Day: Vegan Porn. (Thank you Shy Lux for this link!).
The comments,
as you have probably noticed, have fled for the day. When I have some more time, I will add a set of back-up comments.
as you have probably noticed, have fled for the day. When I have some more time, I will add a set of back-up comments.
lunedì, agosto 11, 2003
Advertising, Big Fat Lies, and Mindless Mechanized Bots
I do understand that I am able to blog free of charge because of the ad at the top, and most of the time it doesn’t bother me. In fact, I have found it mildly amusing that my blog ad is a continuous “Neti Pot” after I talked about my own nasal experiences. Some blogger/google ad bot must scour the pages for words or links and put up a corresponding topic.
So then I became curious about what other people’s blogspot ads might be. Here is a sampling of what I got:
Ari Goes Down had a gay blogger list ad. Probably has something to do with recent discussions of gay marriage.
Xoloitzquintle has an ad for ice cream, which makes sense after ice cream themed posts.
Electronic Ladyland has “Natural Cholesterol Cure,” which makes sense after Atkins Diet posts.
Texas T-Bone has “Madame Alexander Dolls.” Huh? On reload he has “Fairbury’s T-Bone Steaks” and “Jack-in-the-box Toys.” OK, that makes more sense.
Joe Cut the Shit has one called “Save the Marriage” and “Related Searches: joe. dreaming.” OK, whatever.
Shy Lux has “Free Poetry,” which makes sense after many nice poetry-related posts.
These all seemed fine, but I also reached one that pissed me off.
Cati Fabulous has recently given us a very insightful and well-thought-out post on women, weight, and the contradictions inherent in our society. It absolutely sucks that blogger/google negates this content with its mindless bot choice of: “Large and Lovely Personals” and “Big Beautiful Fat Women,” with “Related Searches: Fat Chicks.” OK, fine, though it is completely inappropriate for this site, at least the first one seems to be a dating service for people of a certain weight and their “admirers.” Why not, to each his own. But the second one is not only offensively phrased, it is also false advertising. The pictures on this dating page look like this:
This woman is NOT FAT. If they are trying to tell us that this is a fat woman, I would hate to see a skinny one. Finally, the linked google search for Fat Chicks results in fetish porn and weight watchers recipes, of course. On reload, I also get blogspot ads for diets like “South Beach Diet” and “Lose 15 lbs in 3 days.” It is, indeed, a very apt illustration of the very messed-up messages sent to women about their weight and bodies.
So, should I pay the $ to get rid of the ad on my page, or should I just accept the inevitability of ads everywhere?
I do understand that I am able to blog free of charge because of the ad at the top, and most of the time it doesn’t bother me. In fact, I have found it mildly amusing that my blog ad is a continuous “Neti Pot” after I talked about my own nasal experiences. Some blogger/google ad bot must scour the pages for words or links and put up a corresponding topic.
So then I became curious about what other people’s blogspot ads might be. Here is a sampling of what I got:
Ari Goes Down had a gay blogger list ad. Probably has something to do with recent discussions of gay marriage.
Xoloitzquintle has an ad for ice cream, which makes sense after ice cream themed posts.
Electronic Ladyland has “Natural Cholesterol Cure,” which makes sense after Atkins Diet posts.
Texas T-Bone has “Madame Alexander Dolls.” Huh? On reload he has “Fairbury’s T-Bone Steaks” and “Jack-in-the-box Toys.” OK, that makes more sense.
Joe Cut the Shit has one called “Save the Marriage” and “Related Searches: joe. dreaming.” OK, whatever.
Shy Lux has “Free Poetry,” which makes sense after many nice poetry-related posts.
These all seemed fine, but I also reached one that pissed me off.
Cati Fabulous has recently given us a very insightful and well-thought-out post on women, weight, and the contradictions inherent in our society. It absolutely sucks that blogger/google negates this content with its mindless bot choice of: “Large and Lovely Personals” and “Big Beautiful Fat Women,” with “Related Searches: Fat Chicks.” OK, fine, though it is completely inappropriate for this site, at least the first one seems to be a dating service for people of a certain weight and their “admirers.” Why not, to each his own. But the second one is not only offensively phrased, it is also false advertising. The pictures on this dating page look like this:
This woman is NOT FAT. If they are trying to tell us that this is a fat woman, I would hate to see a skinny one. Finally, the linked google search for Fat Chicks results in fetish porn and weight watchers recipes, of course. On reload, I also get blogspot ads for diets like “South Beach Diet” and “Lose 15 lbs in 3 days.” It is, indeed, a very apt illustration of the very messed-up messages sent to women about their weight and bodies.
So, should I pay the $ to get rid of the ad on my page, or should I just accept the inevitability of ads everywhere?
#?
Can somebody out there tell me why my post-specific permalinks don't work and how to fix them? Thank you.
Can somebody out there tell me why my post-specific permalinks don't work and how to fix them? Thank you.
domenica, agosto 10, 2003
Watching Frontier House on PBS, two things came to mind:
1. These people must have been really nuts to go on this show!
2. In actuality, I would have made a crummy pioneer.
Dress Barn is just a very bad choice of name for a women’s clothing store.
Click on me NOW, Slave! Update:
More ways in which the machines are taking over everything:
1. These people must have been really nuts to go on this show!
2. In actuality, I would have made a crummy pioneer.
Dress Barn is just a very bad choice of name for a women’s clothing store.
Click on me NOW, Slave! Update:
More ways in which the machines are taking over everything:
- Texas T-Bone describes on Aug. 7 how machines may take over the classic high-school job: McDonalds worker person.
(My comment: Now it all makes sense. This is exactly how the machines are going to take over! Feed us so many burgers that we get so fat we can't move, then turn us into their button-clicking slaves.)
- How Robots Will Steal Your Job. 2003 = fired for blogging. 2023 = fired for breathing.
- Not only will they steal your job, they will take over the protests as well!! Robot Rights Protest from the MIT Hack Gallery.
To answer my own question: I do realize that my blog is a little bit racy (I talk about erotic veggies!) and a little bit silly (I talk about erotic veggies!), but that is not really the issue.
I started “Corn Smut” in conjunction with a period of work burnout and academic writer’s block. Since a blog allows me to do some nonacademic writing, I thought it might help me get through the block. It has, to some degree, but it is also very obvious proof of all the time I spend not working. For this, I am embarrassed.
My question for other bloggers continues: Is your blog a secret? Why or why not?
I started “Corn Smut” in conjunction with a period of work burnout and academic writer’s block. Since a blog allows me to do some nonacademic writing, I thought it might help me get through the block. It has, to some degree, but it is also very obvious proof of all the time I spend not working. For this, I am embarrassed.
My question for other bloggers continues: Is your blog a secret? Why or why not?
venerdì, agosto 08, 2003
VegiErotica: A new trend?
I met some friends for lunch today in the Boston/Cambridge area. We had started talking about Saturday morning markets in Providence. First, there is the Farmer’s Market on the grounds of a nearby high school, where they have good fresh vegetables. Then, a few blocks away, there is the weekly discount book sale in the parking lot of Miko Exoticwear. It is basically a few tables with books, but in the back is a multicolored row of discount dildos, all lined up like little soldiers.
One of my friends then remarked that they could combine the two, coming up with vegetable-shaped dildos. I paused. I had not told them about “Corn Smut”**, and it occurred to me that this might have been some kind of a test. It is definitely possible that he could have found this site and guessed whose it is. Or it might have been a complete coincidence.
At this point, people were brainstorming appropriate fruits and vegetables – cucumber, banana – but nobody mentioned corn. So, I think it was a coincidence. Or better: as often happens with emergent trends, the idea of VegiErotica is “in the air.” Just about ready to become the next big thing! I must be a pioneer…
** I have only told a few people about this blog, and I’m not entirely sure why. For some reason, I feel the need to keep it secret from most everyone I know.
My question for other bloggers: Is your blog a secret? Why or why not?
I met some friends for lunch today in the Boston/Cambridge area. We had started talking about Saturday morning markets in Providence. First, there is the Farmer’s Market on the grounds of a nearby high school, where they have good fresh vegetables. Then, a few blocks away, there is the weekly discount book sale in the parking lot of Miko Exoticwear. It is basically a few tables with books, but in the back is a multicolored row of discount dildos, all lined up like little soldiers.
One of my friends then remarked that they could combine the two, coming up with vegetable-shaped dildos. I paused. I had not told them about “Corn Smut”**, and it occurred to me that this might have been some kind of a test. It is definitely possible that he could have found this site and guessed whose it is. Or it might have been a complete coincidence.
At this point, people were brainstorming appropriate fruits and vegetables – cucumber, banana – but nobody mentioned corn. So, I think it was a coincidence. Or better: as often happens with emergent trends, the idea of VegiErotica is “in the air.” Just about ready to become the next big thing! I must be a pioneer…
** I have only told a few people about this blog, and I’m not entirely sure why. For some reason, I feel the need to keep it secret from most everyone I know.
My question for other bloggers: Is your blog a secret? Why or why not?
giovedì, agosto 07, 2003
Corn Smut Exclusive: TELE-BIMBOS OF THE FAR RIGHT!!!
Writes controversial books! Member of Italian Parliament!
Apologist for Joseph McCarthy! Apologist for granddaddy!
Poses with guns. Poses nude.
Which one is more frightening?
Writes controversial books! Member of Italian Parliament!
Apologist for Joseph McCarthy! Apologist for granddaddy!
Poses with guns. Poses nude.
Which one is more frightening?
mercoledì, agosto 06, 2003
Buddy update:
I don’t have the book yet, but reading excerpts in the paper is already making Buddy seem less like a loveable rogue and more like an actual criminal…
More links/facts:
-- Buddy, An American Story. The Buddy Documentary
-- Vice and Virtue, the Two Worlds of Buddy Cianci. The 7-part Providence Journal series (by book author Stanton).
-- Apparently he had a whole wardrobe of toupees. Including a slightly disheveled “disaster” one that he could wear for hurricanes and blizzards. Seriously.
Gym look of the week: Ms. Skintight. In order to show off her complete lack of body fat, she has chosen to wear a very skintight little outfit that is also a bit see-through. And, apparently, no underwear. Which makes me wonder, who are you trying to impress? At least Ms. Skintight doesn’t need a jogbra.
Imaginary Q and A:
Q: Why don’t you ever make fun of men at the gym?
A: There aren’t any men in my class. Actually, are there ever any men in an aerobics class?
Q: Well what do you wear to class then, miss priss?
A: I just wear a boring ol’ t-shirt and boring Old Navy shorts. And, oh yeah, boring ol’ undergarments.
I don’t have the book yet, but reading excerpts in the paper is already making Buddy seem less like a loveable rogue and more like an actual criminal…
More links/facts:
-- Buddy, An American Story. The Buddy Documentary
-- Vice and Virtue, the Two Worlds of Buddy Cianci. The 7-part Providence Journal series (by book author Stanton).
-- Apparently he had a whole wardrobe of toupees. Including a slightly disheveled “disaster” one that he could wear for hurricanes and blizzards. Seriously.
Gym look of the week: Ms. Skintight. In order to show off her complete lack of body fat, she has chosen to wear a very skintight little outfit that is also a bit see-through. And, apparently, no underwear. Which makes me wonder, who are you trying to impress? At least Ms. Skintight doesn’t need a jogbra.
Imaginary Q and A:
Q: Why don’t you ever make fun of men at the gym?
A: There aren’t any men in my class. Actually, are there ever any men in an aerobics class?
Q: Well what do you wear to class then, miss priss?
A: I just wear a boring ol’ t-shirt and boring Old Navy shorts. And, oh yeah, boring ol’ undergarments.
martedì, agosto 05, 2003
Things that may happen while trying to write a dissertation:
- Those ads on TV for a 7-month associates degree at New England Tech start to look very appealing.
- What day is it? Thursday? Saturday? Tuesday? They all seem the same.
- I haven’t left the apartment for 3 days. That couldn’t be good.
- Even though very few people will ever read this blog, it is likely that even fewer will actually read my dissertation. That couldn't be good, either.
Some observations from the past few days
You know it is going to be a bad day when:
You know it is going to be a bad day when:
- You are woken up in the morning by the *thud*thud*thud* of very loud music in the apartment below. (Why does everything, when filtered through a floor, sound like death metal? Even Barry Manilow or Beck!)
- The very first thing you do is open the bathroom door directly onto your nose (that really hurts).
- You find a dead caterpillar in your breakfast blueberries.
- More of your favorite blogs disappear or go on hiatus.
- It is still hot, dreary, and 98% humidity, your office still doesn’t have an A/C unit, and you still have lots and lots of work to finish.
lunedì, agosto 04, 2003
Doesn’t it suck to have to sit behind tall people?
A few months ago, I attended a student production of "Six characters in search of an author" by Luigi Pirandello, which is one of my favorite plays. The play started out as expected, but got stranger and stranger. It was a very loose interpretation of the material. They had the "feminist" phase where all the men dressed up like women and vice versa. Then they had someone playing the "translator" of the play and someone playing Pirandello, wearing a beanie with propeller. They were arguing about what words mean, and they pulled off their clothes to reveal WWF-style wrestling leotards. They wrestled for a while, and then there was a period where they invited the audience to pull out their cell phones and to phone in and tell them what to say. Then "death" came out from behind a tinsel curtain on a flashing light platform with a disco ball. He chased people around, "killing" them with a big bouncy ball. He chased them up and down the aisles, stepping on the toes of the audience and trampling the coats. None of this is in the actual play.
So, as death ran along the aisle behind us, I noticed that the man sitting behind my husband looked like Danny DeVito. Then I realized it was Danny DeVito! I felt bad because my husband is 6’5” and must have been blocking his view.
I remembered hearing that his daughter goes to this school. I checked the playbill and "Lucy DeVito" was one of the actors. I could tell which one she was – quite short and she looked like his daughter. As the play ended and we got up, I saw Rhea Pearlman. She had been sitting right behind me, so I guess I probably blocked her view as well. They are both really short, but he is even shorter than she is. He looked barely 5 feet tall.
Sorry for blocking your view, Danny and Rhea! But I really would have expected you to get better seats.
A few months ago, I attended a student production of "Six characters in search of an author" by Luigi Pirandello, which is one of my favorite plays. The play started out as expected, but got stranger and stranger. It was a very loose interpretation of the material. They had the "feminist" phase where all the men dressed up like women and vice versa. Then they had someone playing the "translator" of the play and someone playing Pirandello, wearing a beanie with propeller. They were arguing about what words mean, and they pulled off their clothes to reveal WWF-style wrestling leotards. They wrestled for a while, and then there was a period where they invited the audience to pull out their cell phones and to phone in and tell them what to say. Then "death" came out from behind a tinsel curtain on a flashing light platform with a disco ball. He chased people around, "killing" them with a big bouncy ball. He chased them up and down the aisles, stepping on the toes of the audience and trampling the coats. None of this is in the actual play.
So, as death ran along the aisle behind us, I noticed that the man sitting behind my husband looked like Danny DeVito. Then I realized it was Danny DeVito! I felt bad because my husband is 6’5” and must have been blocking his view.
I remembered hearing that his daughter goes to this school. I checked the playbill and "Lucy DeVito" was one of the actors. I could tell which one she was – quite short and she looked like his daughter. As the play ended and we got up, I saw Rhea Pearlman. She had been sitting right behind me, so I guess I probably blocked her view as well. They are both really short, but he is even shorter than she is. He looked barely 5 feet tall.
Sorry for blocking your view, Danny and Rhea! But I really would have expected you to get better seats.
sabato, agosto 02, 2003
Click on me NOW, Slave!
I have been feeling more and more like my computer’s slave. By this I mean that its whims continuously interrupt me in the middle of working, and I can only get back to work once I have done its bidding.
A lot of this is related to XP and to the cable internet connection. At first, XP would constantly demand to download its updates then insist on restarting right now, frequently when I was in the middle of something important. It took time and effort to change that, but I still get little “reminder bubbles” all the time. When I am downloading these upgrades, it graciously tells me that “I will be informed” when the process is complete. Well, how considerate!
The second thing is the virus/firewall program. I understand that it is necessary, but its constant demands to download updates (or “important information,” which are upgrade advertisements) have become very frustrating. First, the virus control portion of the program would set off the firewall portion, resulting in me having to agree to allow the (same) program to communicate with the internet. If I clicked “no,” another identical window would pop up until I clicked “yes.” There really is no choice here. The way to fix this is to give it “permission” to do what it wants whenever it wants it.
Even more annoying, I have recently bought a new computer, which I use only for work. I have not ever connected this computer to the internet (on purpose), and I use the old computer for my connection. Unfortunately, the virus program preinstalled on the new computer constantly pops up a window, with no predictable consistency, exclaiming that an internet connection can not be found!!!! I have never found a way to tell it that, no, there is not a connection so stop looking for it! The only option is to disable the whole program or to put up with it. The worst part is that I decided to keep this computer off the net in part to avoid being bothered by these constant demands. (Is it so inconceivable that a computer these days would not have a connection? Does this mean I am guilty of depriving my poor, poor computer? Or am I like the mother struggling to keep her kids from eating sugar or watching TV? Am I scarring it for life?)
Soon, the computer is going to start calling me “girl” and demand a cup of coffee! At least it doesn’t have hands, so it can’t swat me on the butt as I walk by.
I have been feeling more and more like my computer’s slave. By this I mean that its whims continuously interrupt me in the middle of working, and I can only get back to work once I have done its bidding.
A lot of this is related to XP and to the cable internet connection. At first, XP would constantly demand to download its updates then insist on restarting right now, frequently when I was in the middle of something important. It took time and effort to change that, but I still get little “reminder bubbles” all the time. When I am downloading these upgrades, it graciously tells me that “I will be informed” when the process is complete. Well, how considerate!
The second thing is the virus/firewall program. I understand that it is necessary, but its constant demands to download updates (or “important information,” which are upgrade advertisements) have become very frustrating. First, the virus control portion of the program would set off the firewall portion, resulting in me having to agree to allow the (same) program to communicate with the internet. If I clicked “no,” another identical window would pop up until I clicked “yes.” There really is no choice here. The way to fix this is to give it “permission” to do what it wants whenever it wants it.
Even more annoying, I have recently bought a new computer, which I use only for work. I have not ever connected this computer to the internet (on purpose), and I use the old computer for my connection. Unfortunately, the virus program preinstalled on the new computer constantly pops up a window, with no predictable consistency, exclaiming that an internet connection can not be found!!!! I have never found a way to tell it that, no, there is not a connection so stop looking for it! The only option is to disable the whole program or to put up with it. The worst part is that I decided to keep this computer off the net in part to avoid being bothered by these constant demands. (Is it so inconceivable that a computer these days would not have a connection? Does this mean I am guilty of depriving my poor, poor computer? Or am I like the mother struggling to keep her kids from eating sugar or watching TV? Am I scarring it for life?)
Soon, the computer is going to start calling me “girl” and demand a cup of coffee! At least it doesn’t have hands, so it can’t swat me on the butt as I walk by.
venerdì, agosto 01, 2003
Afterthought: In what other city would an openly gay, Italian, Jewish mayor actually be boring? (ie new mayor David Cicilline)
Eagerly awaiting: The Prince of Providence: The True Story of America's Most Notorious Mayor, Some Wiseguys, and the Feds
For those of you unfamiliar with the story, Buddy Cianci is the former mayor of Providence who is now in federal prison for corruption. He is also known for his “Mayor's Own Marinara Sauce” brand and for his terrible toupee:
The abbreviated story as I know it: Buddy was mayor in the 1970’s, and then he went to prison for assault, which may have included putting his cigar out on the forehead of his ex-wife’s new boyfriend. When he got out, he was elected mayor again, and continued to be re-elected. Even though he frequently ran unopposed, he still campaigned heavily, with posters all over the city.
During Buddy’s time as mayor, downtown Providence underwent its “Renaissance,” including uncovering the river, waterfire, Venice-style gondolas, an ice rink, and a new mall. Buddy definitely got things done. The question is how did he get things done?
Then, after various corruption investigations in the past, came “Operation Plunder Dome” where Buddy was accused of running a criminal enterprise out of city hall. When he got the book-length indictment, he waved it in front of the TV cameras and yelled “I am not afraid of this!” He was convicted. So now he is in a New Jersey prison.
I think it is clear that Buddy was corrupt, though I am not sure about specific charges. But I still miss him. First of all, he was interesting. Second, it was clear he really loved Providence and wanted to do whatever he could for the city. The new mayor seems to be doing a good job, but it just doesn’t have the same excitement.
More Buddy links/facts:
For those of you unfamiliar with the story, Buddy Cianci is the former mayor of Providence who is now in federal prison for corruption. He is also known for his “Mayor's Own Marinara Sauce” brand and for his terrible toupee:
The abbreviated story as I know it: Buddy was mayor in the 1970’s, and then he went to prison for assault, which may have included putting his cigar out on the forehead of his ex-wife’s new boyfriend. When he got out, he was elected mayor again, and continued to be re-elected. Even though he frequently ran unopposed, he still campaigned heavily, with posters all over the city.
During Buddy’s time as mayor, downtown Providence underwent its “Renaissance,” including uncovering the river, waterfire, Venice-style gondolas, an ice rink, and a new mall. Buddy definitely got things done. The question is how did he get things done?
Then, after various corruption investigations in the past, came “Operation Plunder Dome” where Buddy was accused of running a criminal enterprise out of city hall. When he got the book-length indictment, he waved it in front of the TV cameras and yelled “I am not afraid of this!” He was convicted. So now he is in a New Jersey prison.
I think it is clear that Buddy was corrupt, though I am not sure about specific charges. But I still miss him. First of all, he was interesting. Second, it was clear he really loved Providence and wanted to do whatever he could for the city. The new mayor seems to be doing a good job, but it just doesn’t have the same excitement.
More Buddy links/facts:
- Buddy Cianci the Musical?!
- On the local news last night, they said that Jon Lovitz’ SNL character “The Liar” was partially based on Buddy! Could it be true? “Yeah, that’s the ticket”
- Mayor Quimby of the Simpsons also has echoes of Buddy (with a heavy dose of Kennedy thrown in).
- What happens if you put a big stencil of Andre the Giant (saying “Obey”) over a Buddy Cianci campaign poster?
